Tag Archives: In The Company of Women

Kind of a Stream of Consciousness

I’m experiencing writers block, or maybe not really. There is a part of me that wants to post on here every day, but not just your usual blog-y content, which is what I’m struggling to write. Recently, I was telling my dear friend Zach how back in day (yes, I can say that) we used to blog every day about whatever, from what we had for lunch, to fights with our parents, or how cute so and so looked in those skinny white jeans and studded white belt. That was before blogging was a job, or photo editing was making pictures more beautiful not just putting them in sepia tone, or social media was actually called social media and not MySpace. Sure, I was a teenager, but I was so excited to come home and plop down in front of the family computer to write on my blog and chat with my friends on AIM. I miss that excitement.

1916386_1170444299299_566133_n

An embarrassing photo of some of the first bloggers circa 2005. Please note the belts.

Last night I got to see Joy Cho speak on panel hosted by Grace Bonney. BLOGOSPHERE QUEENS. I mean, they started their career-forming blogs when I was a teenager wearing hot pink eye shadow. These women inspire me. But their blogs, their social media, it all has an atheistic. It is all a brand. They don’t write about dating, or struggling to pay their bills, or wanting to set Donald Trump’s hair on fire. The further I dive into the idea that I might want to be a blogger, I’m realizing to have a blog that pays your bills, it has to fit a bill. You have to teach people something, or review something, or round-up something, and all of those somethings have to be generally appealing to the same broad audience. There is this quote on the front page of Design*Sponge today from Cheryl Day that says “own your style and don’t even think you have to change who you are to be successful.” And I sort of just want to scream LIES!

img_3969

Alright so maybe you don’t have to change who you are, but you have to edit yourself. You have to pick something. You have to have direction. I can just hear my Mom saying, well yes, you do. But Mom, why?! Why can’t I just do every thing I want to do? Why can’t that be my style? Why can’t I write about how guys send me creepy messages on Tinder, what lipsticks I’m obsessed with right now, how cool *pun* the Arctic is, and open a flower shop, and be an interior decorator, and run for city council? Well Nan (this is my pet name as an adult, which I prefer over my childhood name, Pookie), you just can’t do everything right now. You’ll figure out. Just be patient. Okay, Mom, you can get out of my blog post now. Love you!

Patience. Something I have just about none of. Interest. Something I have for just about everything. My Mom is mostly right (all the time), doing everything is kind of impossible, and I do need to pick a direction, and I will figure it out. I’ve been figuring out. This post is just another step in the figuring. And here’s what I’ve figured today, I’m going to stop trying to brand this blog. I’m going to write as much as I want, whenever I want, about whatever I want, and that’s going to be my style. It might take away from the potential of this blog ever becoming my main hustle, but you know what, if I change my mind I will set all the posts that don’t fit to private and keep movin’ on.

signature